ailurophobe, that makes sense... I have forwarded my ports, the problem may be that my router offers two ways to do this, and the one I used may be some kind of managed forward instead of what must be a more normal/strait through method.. I'll try setting it up through "advanced port forwarding" and see if that helps.
thanks, and I hope this works, I was about ready to simply give up on this, since, as much a fan as I am of the other protocols supported, I don't use them that often, and it seems to not share my files very often... maybe this will help that too..
old_death, I don't know much more about it than what you explained, but I was ruling out hub mode, because there was no time for the network to recognize me as a hub candidate, it picked up the 1000+ connections almost immediately, so unless it caches me as a hub, it should be at least a few minutes before it started throwing all those connections at me. and they probably wouldn't linger so long after quitting. I'll report back when I get a chance to restart my router (required by advanced forwarding, which is why I don't use it all that often..)
and again, thanks for the replies, it will be nice to get this working.
on a side note, is there anywhere I can see some kind of cumulative sharing information?